I’m a planner. If something is in the future, no matter how far ahead, I need to plan for it. If I’m meeting friends at a new restaurant I will google the heck out of where I’m meeting them. I’ll read online reviews and dress code and try and find pictures to figure out the ambiance. I NEED TO KNOW.
One of the reasons that I was OK with the idea of moving in 2012 was that all three girls would have attended the same preschool and Pix would have a year of Kindergarten under her belt. I’m very attached to our school and preschool. They are on the same site (the preschool is an inclusive program for special needs children to interact with “typical” children) and right across the street from our home.
I’ve been starting to look for a preschool for Sprite and an elementary school for Clarabelle and Pixie in the areas that we are hoping to move to. It’s freaking me out. Today I had a mild panic attack while going through all of the websites to these potential schools. I think my biggest problem is that I’m throwing in all of the angst I had during my elementary school years as a child. That was a tough time for me. I was very much like Clarabelle with anxiety and worries, but unlike her, I kept it all inside. There would be a flurry of activity around me while I stood frozen, dying inside. Completely enveloped in fear.
I don’t want to cause my kids any stress, but I know we’ll have to go through the fire and adjust to new. I also know that the new can be even better than what he have now. When I was in 3rd grade my family moved to a new area and I was so afraid to go to a new school, but the new school ended up being even better. I made wonderful friends at that new school and became so close to one of my teachers that I kept in touch with her well into my 20’s. I need to keep reminding myself of these success stories and stop being so negative. Don’t I?