Clarabelle starts the third grade tomorrow and tonight she is a nervous wreck. I don’t know what tomorrow morning will bring. I don’t know if she is going to suffer quietly as I drop her off at school, or if she is going to beg and plead with me to stay “just a little bit longer”. I’ve dealt with this anxiety for 8 years now and I have decided that I need to be strong for myself. I need to take Clarabelle to school and walk away. I’ve done everything I can to make sure she is in a safe, loving environment and now it’s up to her to fight this battle. Not alone. I will always be on her side and helping as much as I can, but I’m spent. I will not spend my days fretting until she comes back home to me.
This decision is a hard one for me and I know that I’ll need a lot of help to talk myself down from the worry. It will be better in the long run.